THE MICROWAVE GENERATION

They call us the Microwave generation for a reason. We are too impatient to work things out.

We have friends/counsels who are quick to advice us to get up and leave if things don't go our way. She cheated on me, so i'm out (I can't take rubbish). He does not love me like before - so i'm out (there must be someone better out there). He does not consider me as equal, so I'm out (What do you consider as equal, maybe we are watching too many western TV). She does not look as beautiful as she was when I married her, so i'm out(ermmm, oga, madam has offloaded 3 children and is expecting number 4 next month). She does not know how to cook my favorite egusi soup, so I looked for alternatives (Please sir, I'm aware that men can cook too - the best chefs are actually men).
All these are just excuses. Stories that touch the heart. We need a bit more commitment in marriage. Not only when things are better, but when it is worse.

Commitment is the willingness to do WHATEVER it takes to make the marriage work, and that means there are going to be MANY times when you're just not going to get your way, and you're going to have to be okay with it. And no, I'm not talking dormant mentality o.

Commitment is when you realize that even if your best friend’s marriage is not working or did not work out, that their story does not have to be your own story. Your life is yours alone. Others can try to persuade you, but they can’t decide for you. They can walk with you,but not in your shoes. What have you decided? Make it work or not?

Our parents had patience.....Yes,even the fathers. A Yoruba adage says"Suuru ni a fi n s' oko obinrin'"It takes patience to be a woman's husband".

They never had it all rosey,ask your parents...There are fights and arguments but it never tore them apart. Our mothers go down on their kneels just to make peace reign, Men love to be respected,they find so much JOY in it,I think it's their birthright.......lol

Nonetheless,so much have been expected from we ladies that the men forgot to LOVE us in return.You didn't marry a slave,you married a companion, a friend, a sister.You shouldn't treat her less.

Some men just want this respect so much forgetting it takes two to make it work, they forgot to love,I mean,to love rightly.

For every failed marriage,you both have contributed to it one way or the other.....Because you had a little misunderstanding in the morning before leaving for work, you immediately opted for your secretary.What happened to the times you left home happily?

If you can't keep forgiving your wife or husband....You have no business getting married....and who says CHEATING is the only way out of a bad marriage?

OK, I would say we need more of TOLERANCE and PATIENCE but we should understand that there's a limit to how one can take these two.Do not frustrate the process, because h/she doesn't talk about it and tolerated your wayward attitude doesn't mean you should go over board.

Let's stop being a MICROWAVE and neither a FIREWOOD ,instead,be a patient burning light who knows ALL WILL BE WELL in no time.

Give room for forgiveness
Give room for so many chances
Tolerate each other
Be patient with each other
Understand each other
Appreciate every little effort of your partner
Stay strong together

Adults get married not babies. ....Act like ONE...stop being a kindergarten couple.
Talk it out and apologize sincerely.
It worked and still working for your parents. ....Why won't it work for you?

Ladies, change your mentality, treat your husband right. Prepare him his meal, do the laundry, be a financial help meet, greet him in the morning etc.The Internet is a fraud, there's nothing like "A modern wife".....A wife is a wife.Act like one.

Your home should be your pride.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Final Year Brethren

FYB - A MERE ACRONYM?? The acronym FYB might only mean FINAL YEAR BRETHREN, it might mean you're no longer offering those 301,204,107 et al but it has more meanings than how it's being viewed. I remembered vividly when I was in 100 level then, I used to presume those guys in 400/500 level knows everything in their field of learning, I used to believe they have answers to every questions thrown at them(not just class questions in this case) but I've grown to discover "schooling is different from education" I've discovered "schooling will only make you to be a literate and not educated" Yes, FYB should mean you're educated, it means you now have the experience, it means posterity should see you as a mentor, it means you know something tangible in your field of study, it means you're a solution to people's problems, and it finally mean you're ready to stand alone in the outside world, FYB is a responsibility and not an appellation, the...
Read more

GASLIGHTING

Image
How do we place MANIPULATION and GASLIGHTING? What is MANIPULATION? This is an act of taking over someone in a clever or unscrupulous way. What is GASLIGHTING? This is a means of  psychologically MANIPULATING you into doubting your sanity. In other words,we can define GASLIGHTING as an act of psychologically taking over someone in an unscrupulous way into doubting their sanity. Now let's talk Gaslighting in interpersonal relationships is often developed or built on an existing power. Gaslighting in relationships is a situation where one person is so important to the other that they don't want to take chances of upsetting or loosing them.This can be found in a boss, friend,siblings and even parents. Gaslighting in romantic relationships or marriages happens when there is an unequal power and the target has given the gaslighter power and often their respect. And we would be looking at Gaslighting in romantic relationships and or marriages. Before we read on and for bet...
Read more

BE SUBMISSIVE

It is time for our young ladies to know that when a man is ready to marry,he will not look out for a woman who will  satisfy his sex drive but a woman with visions and submissive attribute. Excuse my language. ....."Every woman has vagina but not every woman has humility". Sadly, many young ladies in our days(I was part of it)call submission as control,I had this believe that we're equal, we both have a say....I should be able to impose whatever decision I make, I just wanted to be above not anywhere below him,I just want to act like"yea,I am a graduate,you can't just tell me shits, I spent so many years in the university&and a man wants to tell me what not to do or say".Yea,I was like that, Have gat this EGO in me, I just don't want to submit, with the romantic tone of.....I don't want any man to control me o, why I go school nah? (Smiling) Most ladies are like that,but I think it's high time we learnt that if you don't want to submit...
Read more